Would you be your own Friend?

The last few days have been a little bit different in my world.  Now I see it as, well a nudge from God.  A knock on my noggin so to speak.  Lots of ups and down in the family life, work life and personal life.  And my darn phone has been giving up on my the last 3 weeks..(Yep...I repel technology...phones at least)...
  A wonderful person I had the privilege of working alongside in Illinois was getting married in Three Lakes, Wisconsin.  She became a friend instantly when we first met I'd say 7 years ago. We stayed in touch when I moved to Minnesota.  Also picking up where we left off.   So as I followed her excitement through Facebook(the engagement, the planning...) I was so ecstatic to get the invite to her wedding.  It approached pretty quickly.
  And as we know our God...he loves to wake you up when you least expect it.  You feel you are doing Awesome in your walk, you feel the closeness of His presence.  Then the enemy makes you busy.  He knows we humans LOVE to be busy.  Busy. Busy. Busy.  We are so easily distracted.  Soon your morning time with God, is a quick drive through chat with him.  No longer sharing cups of conversation, its now quick blurbs and quicker prayers.  So back to the wedding.  Neal (my awesome loving husband) found out literally last minute that he couldn't go to the wedding with me.  No coverage for him.  UGH....I was none too happy.  So do I go solo? YOU BETCHA! 
  So back to repelling technology and having not so pleasant conversations with my cell company provider.....my phone just quit.  It did nothing.  Booted up.  But past that, it was just decoration.  They could not get me a replacement phone in time for my 5 hour travel to northern Wisconsin.  HOLY SMOKES NO PHONE, NO FACEBOOK, NO EMAIL....for 2 days.  WOW....I wasn't happy.  More or less it was a security blanket too.  You know...young (keep the mouths quiet) woman traveling to the boondocks or small town Wisconsin....all by myself....5 hours(10 hrs both ways) in the car....solo....solo....WAIT....this is where God steps in....Never solo, Jenn.  Duh....So I get to have catch up time with God.  And I was looking forward to the quiet, peace of it all.  (When I realized I had no choice.)   I have an old(er) GMC Jimmy...so there is no plugging in a iPod either!
  I was listening to some radio...flipping through some stations.  I had a couple cd's of Chris Caine ready to go to get inspired and such.  This was a HUGE light switch.   This is what I needed.  And I absorbed it all! 
I got to thinking (after a couple hours of her preaching)...look at yourself.  Look at your Christian Self....Would you be your friend? 
Before I had a relationship with God, I disliked Christians.  I thought they were hypocrites.  They had this righteousness to them.  Full of the "Spirit" and well vinegar too.   Reverands, Pastors, Priests, Nuns...met a few here and there.  I wanted NOTHING to do with them.  They wanted NOTHING to do with me.  I was this crazy punk rocker who could conquer the world, doing the good I wanted and saw that needed to be done....Having benefit shows(for you non Chicagoans...a wee little concert of punk rock spectacularness)  to raise money for teen moms, giving food to the homeless under the "L" tracks in Wrigleyville.  I never saw a Christian doing that....or did I?
  Young in my 'Christian life,' happily married to a Christian Man, getting involved with Church in Naperville Illinois....I was so excited when I was asked to be part of the Children's Ministry.  I was early to a meeting to be introduced to the team.  I was sitting on the lobby couch (it was by the coffee) when I overheard two women, whom I had known but they didn't know me....my back was turned to them.  They were talking....and they were talking about me.  Why was I allowed to be on the board? I had once been a teen mom, I was divorced....and I had my nose pierced.  Here I was so excited to be ASKED to be a part of something....and here is where my spirit fell.  Here the two members of the same congregation, who were in the Ministry, here...they were hurting me....So the old me would of jumped on the couch...raised my fist and say..."To Heck (well wouldn't of said that...but this is a G rated blog) with you and your church...." but I wiped my tears away(i did cry) and walked over to the two ladies...I held my hand out to them and said.  "Hi, I am Jenn Uitto, and I can't wait to hear ALL you have to say about the Children's ministry..."  I got a cup of coffee and headed to the room.    So I will admit I had a smug satisfaction of watching their jaws drop...duh...I had JUST heard the whole rip session on me.  I sat through the meeting thinking it was the last....went home and cried and yelled at Neal about his church, then called HIS mom ( and you don't want to make her upset...she protects her cubs)...and well....there were apologies made...and I stayed on the committee for a long long time. 
  SO why were they so polluted?  What, inside them....what was stirred up...that made them dislike me?  it was in them...not me....did I reflect something in their past, that corrupted their Christianity? 
   Are you a polluted Christian?  I know some.  Some that never smile.  Some that are so full of this sour grape attitude....that you ask...is is hard to keep up the bitterness...gosh it must be exhausting!  They are full of ideas for the church, full of battleplans for the sinners.  Full of this energy that they beleive are doing the right thing....but its just not in the right way. 
  Then I know some Ah-mazing Christians....some that walk into the room and you see the glow of the LOVE of the Lord and their love for fellow mankind...you just want to be a part of that!  They have this Holy Spirit pouring out of them.  I would name names...and YES you are probably on it, if you are reading this long winded blog.   These are the ones who would loan a friend a car when theirs goes caput without a thought, the first ones to start a ministry with you because you share a dream, the ones who help neighbors whose house burns down and their church is dragging its feet in some places(not local..not RVC) , you took action. The ones who win a national cooking contest and their first thoughts are how to feed the hungry... The ones who stop what they are doing and lift you up in prayer....These are my friends.  These are reflections of God.  They WOULD give you the shirt off their backs if you needed it...not shaking their head at you saying..You should of planned better.  I have seen such good in my friends. 
So.  Would you be your own friend? Are you 'that' Christian that people call hypocrite?  Or do they just know you are a Christian because of what people see, what they witness. That you give glory to God in all of the busy chaos that is created ups and downs!  For broken phones.  For doors opened and for doors that are shut. 
I had some awesome alone time with God over the weekend.  Yeah...it was forced, and I probably would of not chosen this.  But I am so glad I got another two by four to the head.  I got to think a lot about 3G and our path.  I just wish I had a tape recorder to record my ideas.  They are in my noggin regardless.  I had 10 hours of inspiration.  Then to wrap up I got to be at a child's dedication at our church of some AWESOME friends, and hear a message from my Pastor that brought tears to his eyes and mine.  This wrapped up a crazy weekend in a gorgeous package. Be the person That God would smile and say..."Thats my girl..." Or "Thats my guy..."  full of Pride that you are reflecting His Love. 
Would I be my friend?  better yet....Am I yours? Am I a reflection?  I am trying...I am growing....

PS: Congrats to Karla and Andrew(may God always remain  the center of your Marriage)....Congrats to Kate and Rick (the love you have for God, is so poured into your family I am so blessed to call your friends! Congrats on the dedication of your daughter and your Family!) ...
Thanks Pastor Rob, for your message this weekend.